the perfect machine

as hurricane irma bears down on the east coast, now do you believe climate change is a Real Thing?
huh?
maybe? warmer water means bigger and more ferocious storms.
the dryer is now fixed, steve from richard's appliance did a fine job and tells us that now that the vent problem is fixed, we will probably never need another unit. which is a good thing. since between cleaning and sterilizing the duct work and the new dryer parts and labor, this little snafu cost almost a grand to fix.
so, word to the wise?
NEVER USE MORE THAN ONE DRYER SHEET...ever.

Hiiiiiii
👍
1
WED 12:44PM
damn i missed you...12 hours ago. i am waking up to robert johnson.
FRI 10:07PM
at this point i do not know if mary is going to pay her rent, or not. ever since my conversation with my social worker earlier today, she has been on a rampage. i have no idea why.
she does not need a reason. i suppose nobody really does. shit happens, even internally.
i am about to smoke a bowl here and then i'll be right as rain.
so you trolled karl's page? he is a great guy. he is a fucking maniac. bipolar 1, vs my bipolar 2.
when he goes manic, he ends up in the hospital. it is way more severe in nature than my hypomania. and he is quite good at describing the experience. karl is NOT BORING lol
IIe...
oops that was supposed to be my bong symbol
IIr...
new deadly women right now. i am taping it. that show is so good for keeping perspective. see? whatever mary does, compared to every single one of these women, she is an angel haha
i sent you a friend suggestion, but a word to the wise about karl...he is kinda...militant. more brash than me at least. my mom had to unfollow him cause of his, uh, abrasive atheism. i agree with the atheism part, but at times differ with his approach.
ok...mary is quieter now, and just came downstairs and did not yell at me. it is so bewildering at times cause i literally never know what might set her off. it's like living with a contact explosive.
nitrogen tri-iodide
google it. you can set that shit off by breathing on it.
i think i can put that in a song hmmm
i got some sleep today but i have pretty much been on a three day manic moment...i am enjoying the ride while it lasts. i have gotten tons done, as usual. it must be hard living with me 😞
nothing that the wicked pickett can't solve...99 and a half won't do...
3:31PM

and sandy i think is most excited of all. he is getting chicken breasts later tonite. he will eat an entire one, and quickly too. he is definitely a carnivorous beast! he never saw a piece of meat he did not like.
no, not my sandykins. our sandykins. as i was telling joe from puro clean, since as it turned out it was just him over today, with many fascinating contraptions. and he took an amazing amount of gunk out of our duct system. omg. it was vile.
joe is one of the tribe, 55 to my 53, and i liked him so much i hugged him when he left. he LOVED the tunes i played today!
he was working from 9am sharp til past noon, and he not only vacuumed up all the animal droppings and what have you, mainly from the two main registers here on the first floor. it has not been done, maybe ever, before. now joe insists we will breath ever so much better, and we're set for at least five years.
awesome!
so...tonite i am settling in to the buckeyes/hoosier game, and i think we are favored by 20...
i never finish my thoughts when i am manic. most assuredly so. i been up since noon yesterday and it is now past 8pm and not a single yawn as of yet.
strangers in the house, even welcome ones, can set me right off man. anything can. i never know what will happen next..

thank you michael moore, you are the biggest voice for sanity in our country today.
yes. they got twenty more years at most. and just like you, i cannot WAIT.
it will be a much better country. white men are EVIL FUCKERS. i know, i'm one, i like to think a more advanced or evolved one, but i look at it as a hindrance.
i got SOUL bro! and i have always thought instead of all this crazy race against race against race stuff, we should be working on melding them all so there IS NO DIFFERENCE AT ALL ANYMORE>
think of it. a race of tall, almond eyed, afro sporting UBERMENSCH..and we're going to need to get the best out of all of us, cause eventually, the aliens WILL come. and we might need to be evolved as fuck to survive it.

one year ago, i was awakening in my usual way, peeing in a coffee container, and i blearily booted up my trusty computer, this one i am sure, which has never given me a moment's problem, and i am glad i was done peeing and had put the cover safely back on, cause as soon as i got on facebook, there was notification of entries on nancy's page, and my gut sank deeper than the salt-encrusted perfectly flat floor of the dead sea.
i get on google plus, and yup, a message, 'this is joseph. nancy passed away today.'
a very modern way to get horrible earth shattering news, n'est ce pas?
if nancy were still alive, i would tell her i love her. i don't think i got a chance before she died.
so what am i trying that's new? i put on steve miller band's 'brave new world', and put on my headphones and cranked the fuck out of it. these headphones are by far the best sounding ones i have got. and i think they cost like 25 bucks. i remember when i bought them, they had an incredible range, way beyond human hearing on both ends of the spectrum.
so i am sitting here in a perfectly adjusted office chair, at my computer of course, and i can CONCENTRATE...
mary is upstairs singing and muttering, and i don't wanna hear it. i am too emotional. i need peace. steve miller will do. i love his 70s stuff.
this is his third album, according to groove music, it was the soundtrack of the summer of '69...
the big hit of course was space cowboy, and yeah, that's a fucking great song.

so grieco, what next?

i am not sure. keep getting better, slowly slowly but so far so good. get mary a clarinet. maybe even an electric piano.
as i have said many times in the past, living with my lovely ex wife is like living inside of a mothers of invention tune...i can't imagine anything else.

oh hey hi! sorry i never called you back, i slept for a long long time. when i don't take my meds it can be sketchy when i finally do take them.
Gregory
yeah indeed, if someone took my meds and was not used to them they would be passed out in a half hour
'
i slept all day so i will be up all night now and i'm all topsy turvy again. oh well. it's not that big a deal. ivory is three hours behind us, and charlotte is five hours ahead.
Gregory
in a week it will be a year since nancy died. the end of twenty lost years. we met in '96, and she dies in '16. might have been to the day of when we met for all i know. and i am doing so so much better. you do know that she was the one who convinced me to start drinking again don't you? i was re-reading my blog from last year and she was persona non grata ever since i told her to go to treatment. it might have saved her life if she had gone, or if the court had not been so easy on her after she got the DWI in 2015.
Gregory
on the anniversary on the 22nd i am going to take off my pent and put it away in my special box. i am done
the period of mourning is over, and it's time for a new chapter in my life.
i do not need it any longer.
i will hopefully be making appts later for my medical doc for sure. i want to try chantix to stop smoking. i am as stable as i am ever going to get so i want to give it a try. i doubt i will go off the deep end.
actually maybe i should rephrase that. i am not that stable. earlier tonite and ever since i woke up i have been in a tizzy. mary is not the only one here who has meltdowns. i sure do. just not in public. except the one time i had a panic attack in walmart and bolted on you..

so it just might be finally happening. she might actually move out this time. i am going to miss her. my greatest fear is she will just disappear from my life, like her four previous husbands. i don't want to be on that list.
we'll see. i will live on no matter what happens. obviously, she won't be able to move out totally for some time. it's on 152nd, easy to get to on the bus, but a long long walk.
she borrowed my cell fone and is walking there. it will take at least two hours. good luck!
now, time for a hot bath in my empty home..

i live!
i am not going to die anytime soon. i am good to go til around christmas. kate (a proud member of clan stewart) and i had a good long talk and i oddly enough found myself agreeing with her on almost every subject.
nothing more..stimulating...than a smart and pretty professional.
i am still manic as fuck...about three days now..i got ten hours or so sleep in the middle somewhere, but now today i'm bouncing in my seat like a middle school schlub with a rock hard woody in gym class.
ok then. gonna see what happens if i make this public.

this might take some time, even days. in the meantime, i am watching criminal intent on some channel or other, and i might as well say it here now, i am very happy with spectrum, the new time/warner. everything works as advertised, except for the voice mail on the fone, but i can always get a machine to answer